Self doubt sucks, you sit there and it hits with the power of a tornado.
The wind being knocked outta your sails doesnt even begin to describe how it feels for me.
Cause i just sit there, and then all of a sudden, i start thinking
"What if this isnt right?"
"What if this is the wrong choice?"
“What if im wrong?”
"What do i do now?"
Its the most annoying thing that happens to me on a daily basis, just a lil self respect could go along way, but when i forget to take my pills or its just one of those days where i feel horrible just being alive, the best thing i can do is talk to those who make me happy.
So thats what i aim to do, talk to those who make me happy, cause that shit is addictive, smiles are addictive, and so are you.
But how do i know that being happy is enough and that i am doing the right thing? i always get the feeling that im not going to succeed in anything, that others are better off than i am, and that i basically just generally dont do enough to get by, or only enough to get by.
Am i close to getting it right? How will i know when i am? How will i know when im happy, cause i’ve been faking it for so long?
You know that sound that comes through your speakers if you have your phone to close to them?
I get that sound so often come through my speakers when im at the computer, I sit there and watch my phone incase it lights up or plays my txt alert really loudly.
But i dont get a txt, in fact i can go a whole week without getting txt’d by anyone.
I feel sad that i even have a phone.
Also now doubt that ill be getting any sleep tonight, and i have an early class in the morning.
Should i even care?
Get me outta hea!
he says with a week till things change AGAIN.
Seriously get out of my head.
I dont want you there.
Writing a poem, depending on how many times i have to go over it, i might put it up on my tumblr.
Just want to get certain people outta my head.
just for tonight.